Mothers. We are experts at multi-tasking. It's probably a class that we should all take before having children to help us learn how to be "skilled" multi-taskers. But often, we are just thrown into it, hoping to keep our heads above water by the end of the day. Mothers can cradle a baby, prepare dinner, help a child with school work, and wipe a buggery nose, all at the same time. It's no wonder at the end of the day, we are exhausted.
Our minds are constantly going-thinking about what we need to do to keep the family functioning. Our "To Do" lists are continually growing, and when we think we are able to cross many items off, it grows again: Treats for daycare. Birthday card for grandma. Pick up dry cleaning...
Finding time to take care of ourselves is challenging. It's no wonder many mothers find themselves "letting go" and forgetting about ourselves.
So have I become the yoga pant wearing-shower when I can-pull my hair in a pony tail kind of mother? Not exactly, but when you have limited time, you do JUST enough. Obviously, I work 5 days a week so I can't live in sweatpants all day long, although if I were a stay at home mom, maybe things would be different. If we are going somewhere on the weekend, the last thing I do is get dressed because I have toddlers and we all know how messy they are. (I have one in particular whose daycare teacher even mentioned what a messy eater he/she is! My mom recently reminded me of when my brother's teacher told her he was the messiest kid she has ever had in class-I hope this one isn't following down his/her uncle's path). We literally lift each twin out of their highchair after a meal, holding them as far away from us as possible to prevent their messy paws from getting on us, and bring them over to the sink for a washing. CW enjoys playing in the water and pulling the faucet down, occasionally spraying one or both of us. Once everyone is cleaned, diapered, dressed and in the van, I get dressed :). Until that point, I am slummin' in my jammies.
Mothers are pros at looking at their "To Do" list and determining the best strategy to getting some things accomplished. We need groceries, household items, dad needs a new light bulb and I have a sack of stuff to donate- We'll hit super Target to knock out a couple things, run to Home Depot quick and then swing by Goodwill on our way home. Meanwhile, we are always worried about the timing of these errands. Has everyone eaten? Who hasn't pooped today? Will we have to worry about diaper changes while we are out and about (I NEVER bring a diaper bag in the stores. I know my children's potty habits like riding a bicycle. However, I know some day one of them will surprise me and have a big blowout in the middle of a shopping trip, but luckily this hasn't happened yet. I always have diapers and wipes in the van, but NOT extra clothes). I guess the day that big blowout occurs will put an abrupt stop to my errand running.
Now, I am VERY lucky that I rarely, if ever, take all three kids alone to run errands. Justin usually tags along if we're making it a family affair which is very helpful. Props to all those with 3+ kids who make multiple errand stops in one day by yourself. Just getting kids in and out of the vehicle is a chore, and even more annoying in winter: Start the van so it can warm up. Run child out to the van without coat on and buckle him/her in. Shut door. Run inside and grab the second child and buckle him/her into the van. Shut the door. Carry 4 year old out to the van when she's "too cold" to walk by herself. Shut the door. Get in the driver's seat. Turn around and buckle 4 year old in, allowing her to tighten before you do or she will make you start all over. Drive to destination. Unbuckle 4 year old. Help her put on her coat and hat while twins are whining at you to get them out of the car. Let 4 year old open CW's door or she will shut it and open it again. Put hat and coat on child. Carry child over to the other side of the van. Set child on the floor of the van while putting hat and coat on second twin. Put one twin on each hip. Shut the door. Look to see where your 4 year old is (which is usually right beside me, but you never know!). Walk into the store. Whew, that's exhausting just typing that all out...
Now fathers, you can be good multi-taskers too, but your limit is usually 2, MAYBE 3 things at once. A man's mind is usually not constantly thinking of all the things that need to be done, cleaned, purchased, put away, thrown away, or given away. Mothers are the ones that think of anything and everything that might be needed for an overnight stay or a weekend get away: Medication in case someone has a fever, a teether if someone is teething, my daughter's favorite blanket, my husband's baby teeth (OK, just kidding, I threw those away, but you see what I'm saying). I have a sister in law, who seriously brings everything but the kitchen sink when they visit. At first I thought it was a little crazy, but I think they end up using most of what she brings. She is always well prepared and there have been many times when we are all together and we needed to use something that she had because I forgot something.
There are times when I think to myself: I can't wait to have a full day where I only have to worry about myself, not anyone else, I can read, watch TV, nap, eat (without someone mooching off my plate), and not worry about a darn thing that needs to be done. Then I think, how boring would that be? I am definitely one of those people who thrives on being busy. I am more organized and a clearer thinker when I am busy. It's when things slow down and I actually have 10 minutes to myself that I feel so "lost." So I will continue multi-tasking. A few weeks ago, I mastered playing a game with my four year old, cooking lunch, baking cookies and washing dishes. So what if the grilled cheese got a "little done" we all survived and I felt SO accomplished!
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